4.27.2011

May 21, 2011 & Oct 21, 2011 - a load of crap

I saw a billboard advertising that Judgement Day was coming on May 21, 2011. I thought it was an ad for a movie release called Judgement Day. Apparently it's not - apparently people are taking it seriously, with a bunch of hand-plucked Bible verses and haphazardly interpreted scriptures to support some numerological "clues" they claim to have found in the Bible.

I'm here to tell you, and prove to you, it's a bunch of bullshit - using the Bible as my source. Here's the gist of the story:

  • The Bible left us clues about the passage of time for God vs that of Man.
  • The genealogy from Genesis "can be shown to be a precise calendar of the history of mankind in this world."
  • The Flood happened in 4990 BCE.
  • God gave Noah 7 days to get into the boat.
  • In 2 Peter 3, a Day to God is equivalent to 1000 years, and 1000 years is a Day.
  • Doing the math, 1000 x 7 days = 7000 years to accept Christ. 7000 years after the flood 4990 BCE (removing year 0, as none exists, results in 2011 CE.
  • Noah was shut into the boat in the 2nd Month & 17th day of 4990 BCE.
  • Somehow, the tract goes on to talk about how the 17th day of the 2nd month coincides with May 22 as the Day of Pentecost from 33 CE, and jumping 1955 years into the future, the church age came to its conclusion on May 21st 1988 (13000 years after the incorrectly calculated Creation date from Genesis: 11,013 BCE)
  • Then you have a 23 year tribulation period or 8400 days from Pentecost of 1988 to cover the "awful period of judgment upon the churches" supposedly found in Matthew 24:21. 23 Years from 1988 coincides with May 21, 2011.
  • Throw in 1 Seal from Revelation that names a time span, say 5 months, from Revelation 9, and then you have a period of 5 months before the End of the World on October 21, 2011.
Now, if you have any common sense (and I know it's hard to come by these days for a lot of people), this should not add up.

I'm not even going to go into the issue with Young Earth Creationists who think the earth has only been around for 6,000 to 10,000 years, and that nothing could have possibly existed longer than the spoken word.

First of all, the Flood is not an allegory or allusion to the end of the world. Second, you can't pluck 1-3 verses, or a handful of verses that aren't even consecutive, and use them to build a case. I know this is a popular "Thing" for pastors to do in their sermons...but it's dumb, wrong, and inaccurate.

If you read the article, as I did [for sheer morbid curiosity] then you'll see that nearly every verse is taken out of context. If you take Genesis 7:4
4 "For after seven more days, I will send rain on the earth forty days and forty nights; and I will blot out from the face of the land every living thing that I have made."
you'll see mention to "seven more days." The tract conveniently uses this as their foundation for spanning from Noah to Judgement Day. But what about the 40 days, or 40,000 years of rain? That extends well beyond the current age of the Earth according to their timeline.

Then, pull in Peter from the New Testament, but be sure to take the 3 verses out of context, just before the key 4th verse starts:
6 ...through which the world at that time was destroyed, being flooded with water.
7 But by His word the present heavens and earth are being reserved for fire, kept for the day of judgment and destruction of ungodly men.
8 But do not let this one fact escape your notice, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day.
This seems like a valid explanation of conversion of time when talking about supreme beings in relation to mortals. But it's not. If you had kept reading the verses, you would find that verse 9 has the context for those words:
9 The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.
It is a figurative comparison, simply saying "Hey, the guy who's been around since the beginning of time, and will be around for the rest of time, is not concerned about your petty 24-hour periods of humanly devised timekeeping. Oh, by the way, he's sovereign, and cares about you. That's why he's waiting: for your dumb ass to have a chance."

That pretty much destroys the foundation of the argument right there...but let's keep going.

Judgement Day - May 21,2011: wtf?

So, we've got Creation marked as 11,013 BCE. Throw 7000 years on it for the 7 days Noah has to get into the boat...that puts us as 2011. In parallel, The Church Age began on Pentecost (May 22) of 33 CE, the year Jesus died.

Somehow, Matthew 24:21 is supposed to signify that (according to the tract) "the end of the Church Age would occur simultaneously with the beginning of the great tribulation":
21 "For then there will be a great tribulation, such as has not occurred since the beginning of the world until now, nor ever will.
Except that it doesn't:
15 "Therefore when you see the ABOMINATION OF DESOLATION which was spoken of through Daniel the prophet, standing in the holy place (let the reader understand),
16 then those who are in Judea must flee to the mountains.
17 "Whoever is on the housetop must not go down to get the things out that are in his house.
18 "Whoever is in the field must not turn back to get his cloak.
19 "But woe to those who are pregnant and to those who are nursing babies in those days!
20 "But pray that your flight will not be in the winter, or on a Sabbath.
21 "For then there will be a great tribulation, such as has not occurred since the beginning of the world until now, nor ever will.
22 "Unless those days had been cut short, no life would have been saved; but for the sake of the elect those days will be cut short.
23 "Then if anyone says to you, 'Behold, here is the Christ,' or 'There He is,' do not believe him.
24 "For false Christs and false prophets will arise and will show great signs and wonders, so as to mislead, if possible, even the elect.
25 "Behold, I have told you in advance.
26 "So if they say to you, 'Behold, He is in the wilderness,' do not go out, or, 'Behold, He is in the inner rooms,' do not believe them.
27 "For just as the lightning comes from the east and flashes even to the west, so will the coming of the Son of Man be.
28 "Wherever the corpse is, there the vultures will gather.
See what happens when you pluck one verse out of a speech? Unless you go back and read the entire context in which it is used, you can use it to support anything. The use of Matt 24:21 doesn't even make approximate sense for supporting the end of one age coinciding with the beginning of another. It says if you see the "Abomination [of /that causes] Desolation" in the temple/holy place, THEN you will be on the eve of a great tribulation as a result of what that Abomination will impose on you. You know...like Rome did just before Nero put the people of Israel through utter hell until Constantine made a political move to make Christianity the official religion of Rome, but also allowing anyone to practice whatever religion they choose?

I'm still not sure where the 1988 references comes from, unless it is simply because this guy, Harold Camping, who is promoting this crap, left his last church that year.

But still, let's say 1988 was the end of the Church Age and the beginning of the Tribulation. For 23 years? Apparently that's related to the reign of Josiah through Zedekiah, from 609-586 BCE, when it was conquered by the Babylonian Empire under Nebuzar-adan, captain of Nebuchadnezzar's body-guard. It's quite an interpretive stretch of the imagination to pluck that one period out of history - especially when King David started his reign of Judah/Israel 400 years before that, bringing the timeline of the "reign of Israel" to 423 years.

But let's move on...So we have managed to convince ourselves that 5/22/88 was the end of the Church Age, and that coincidentally coincides with the start of the Great Tribulation, which will obviously take 23 years, because that's how long the last 5 kings reigned in Judah. That puts us at May 21, 2011 where *BAM* the rapture happens, because just as the 17th day of the 2nd month God shut the door to the ark in Noah's time (cutting off any chance of salvation from the flood), so is the 17th day of the 2nd month in 2011 (5/22/11) the day God will shut the door of salvation from hell, and anyone who didn't accept Christ will perish. Jim, let's go to the map, er verses...
1 Thessalonians 4:16-17:
16 For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first.
17 Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we shall always be with the Lord.
OK, that verse is what it is. In Thessalonians, Paul was comforting the folks over at Thessalonica about what happens to their dead Christians. According to the tract, only True Believers will be caught up, leaving the rest of Mankind (billions of people) left behind to experience the awful judgment of God - a horrible period of 5 months of torment upon earth. Where do we find this in the bible? Why Revelation 9:3-5 of course:
3 Then out of the smoke came locusts upon the earth, and power was given them, as the scorpions of the earth have power.
4 They were told not to hurt the grass of the earth, nor any green thing, nor any tree, but only the men who do not have the seal of God on their foreheads.
5 And they were not permitted to kill anyone, but to torment for five months; and their torment was like the torment of a scorpion when it stings a man.
*BAM!* Except there's one more thing. This is the 5th Seal. FIFTH! This is not the last thing that happens before the End of the World. It's not even the account of Judgement Day. It's it 1/21th of a series of events (#19 of 21, Rev 9:1-12) leading up to Armageddon with Jesus' Return to Earth as a warrior (#21 of 21, Rev 11:15-19).

So in reality, if May 22, 2011 is the trigger date, then the world should be prepared for a giant ass swarm of locusts that have stingers like scorpions, to bother (but not kill) you until October 21, 2011.

Wow. What a bastardization of an already misinterpreted book of ancient literature. I guess Harold Camping can join Terry Jones & others among the misinformed and misguiding religious authorities in the on-going discussion of "What went wrong" when they get to Hell.

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